December 2009
97 posts
2010
So as part of my new years resolution I need to accept that what’s done is done, and it’s better to shift direction than to dig myself deeper into a hole. I made a good list of resolutions. One important thing is to be proactive, follow through, no more lame procrastination. Plan and stick to the plan no matter what happens, whether depressed, sick or tired, whether the rain is rain,...
I don’t even know anymore. I need some help controlling my emotions. It’s very annoying how my mind and my emotions like to have a mind of its own, it’d be nice if they worked mutually. Somehow think of it so much that it will eventually burn off and disappear into thin air, completely. No more backward rationalization. Let’s think logic.
What a lonely Christmas Eve, literally. I don’t usually mind desolation but it doesn’t fit in, especially during holidays. I don’t know.
Never purchase HD on itunes, never. I’m sick in bed, just what I needed the day before Christmas. Two more days till I feel better.
Been contemplating rather or not I should purchase Giuliana & Bill Season 1 on itunes. I finally purchased it in HD. This is probably one of the stupidest things I spent my money on. Oh well, I’ll enjoy watching it.
“Too much, too many, and too often of what you want becomes what you don’t want.”
You know with Christmas just around the corner… I hate that expression “just around the corner.” Anyhow, I did purchase gifts for people but I tend to expend more for self-indulgence. I’ve been actually doing this for the past couple of weeks, and this is the reason why my bank digits are plunging. Yet, today I did it again. I’m either really stressed or I like to...
I hate loafing around and being unproductive. I got tired, so I lied in bed hoping to get some sleep, nope, I literally coerced myself to sleep. Now I have this throbbing headache. Hate feeling like this. I feel as if I need to go out and make use out of my break. Do amazing things. There’s no one cool around here, all superficial bitches. I planned on hibernating over break, but it’s...
“I don’t hate people, I just feel better when they aren’t around.”
– Charles Bukowski
“The more I see, the less I know for sure.”
– John Lennon
Man. I never follow through what I tell myself not to do, instead I forget. I’m a loyal B&N customer but I decided to stop by Borders today. I think I made such a strange purchase, I mean, who buys a pocket SUPER thesaurus? I do, it makes me feel elated. Weird. I told this guy I’m strange, he said “good.” These small things make me chuckle like a little girl. Yeah,...
“Now I think of no one any more. I don’t even bother looking for words. It...”
– Sartre
Details, 1992
David Keeps: Do you feel loneliness even though you could easily be surrounded by people?
Morrissey: Yes I do, because loneliness has nothing to do with how many people are in the room with you.
You know those days… days when you can’t feel…? Maybe not. As if something is blocking your emotions to feel anything, feeling numb. I believe I wished for this couple of weeks ago when I was feeling highly emotional. Now my brain is confused, it can’t process this abnormality. Last night when I tried to fall asleep, I just ended up having the worst sleep ever, waking life....
I seriously need to cut back on spending money. I spent way too much at B&N, more than I should of, which stopped me from buying anything elsewhere. Steaz, good stuff. I plan on getting a whole pack of Steaz. So good.
“I can’t take my mind off you
I can’t take my mind…
My mind…my mind…
‘Til I...”
– Blower’s Daugther, Damien Volcano (via kari-shma)
“It is one of life’s bitterest truths that bedtime so often arrives just when...”
– Lemony Snicket (via kari-shma)
It is the circumstance now.
Could it really be that I found my soul mate? or am I just longing for a genuine person to step into my life? Most of the time I believe that things happen for a reason, good or bad it’ll have some significance. As if something is “written” on your destiny, then the whole world will conspire to make it. I’m in a situation where I can’t really describe why it’s...
I swear I’m no pervert. So here’s the thing, I definitely bombed my calc exam and I think I passed chemistry, I’ll just believe that I did. Overall this semester sucked and I’m glad it’s done with. I’m ready to leave 2009 behind. Ready for 2010.
5 tags
Super-sensual sex
Gee I really don’t know what’s wrong with me, my libido is at its all time high. I desire for slow-burn sexual intimacy.
I’m on a study break. Mind you about few past posts, I just really like sex and quite frank about it too.
“i like my body when it is with your
body. it is so quite a new thing.
muscles...”
– ee cummings
I need to stop whatever I’m doing, thinking, and start studying. I need to stop indulging on materialistic gratification, not to mention I just bought a $200 jacket. I need to stop moping around and get at it and own chem and calc, my two FAVORITE subjects. So many needs, wants, to dos, not to dos, must do, must not do, need to, does not need to.
“I heard what you said. I’m not the silly romantic you think. I don’t want the...”
– Shana Abé (via kari-shma)
6 tags
Um I definitely had to delete my post from couple of hours ago, jeez I was apoplectic at that moment, my bad. I think my temper flares up when I can’t accomplish schoolwork at the time given. But now that I got 2-3 hours of studying in I feel like slowly recovering from an addiction, procrastination is a highly habit-forming ritual, and I hate it… hate it hate it HATE IT, DIE. Well,...
6 tags
Couple of months ago I read that ADHD can develop in early adulthood, and having this information embedded somewhere in the back of my mind, I couldn’t disregard. I know I’ve ranted couple of times of how I couldn’t focus, and sometimes I would sit for six hours having nothing accomplished, only to develop constant distractions. Just to feed my curiosity I took an online...
“Nothing that’s worthwhile is ever easy. Remember that.”
– Nicholas Sparks (via kari-shma)
“I always thought that there was this one perfect person for everybody in the...”
Because I know you’re more than what people see…
I don’t know if this is an immediate feeling, but I don’t think much about that guy I was ranting about for couple of days. I’m actually kind of happy, slowly becoming oblivious to the whole situation. I just want to make myself a drink and sleep, will do.
Have you ever had those nights when you felt as if you had no sleep but somehow ended up dreaming for 7 hours? I don’t know. I had couple, and last night was one of those nights… somehow I managed to wake up without feeling groggy, surprise. I even chugged a Starbucks peppermint mocha. Well at least I’ll be somewhat pumped for a long day/night. By the way, I need to quit being...